Day 11 – 01/21/2026

I feel like I finally have the courage to charge forth into this unknown future of mine. Not knowing what is meant to be is fine, as it allows me to not dwell on what could be but on what is. What I can change in this very moment about my life, about myself. It allows me to spend time working on the little details that will hopefully build towards the big picture that is a fulfilling life.

I feel like I finally have the courage to try and work my emotions to the bone…and just live with them until I can find more help. It’s not that I feel extreme intensity anymore, I still do…it’s just easier to calm myself again. It’s also tiring to both mind and body to constantly be focused on oneself every minute of everyday…that I feel fine to give myself some breathing room to relax and not relapse into complacency.

I feel like I finally have the courage to open my heart…to the world again…to wear it on my sleeve proudly and not be offended if someone doesn’t enjoy the man I am, or meant to be. To be vulnerable with poise and strength, for those that I love and cherish.

I feel like I finally have the courage to break the silence and not worry about potentially drowning in regret…in order to speak truly to her…I have to open my heart, to charge forth into the unknown, to take that risk…I feel like my journey is no where close to being over, but I’m no longer worried that opening up about my journey so far will push her away…because well…she always wanted me to be open and honest in the past…and I wasn’t…so why not now.

I have the courage to keep on living life for the betterment of myself, my family, my loved ones.